Got a new book today called "The Cynic's Dictionary" - let me share a few gems!
Clairvoyant - a person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely that he is a blockhead.
Children - items that have become so expensive, only the poor can afford them.
Doctor - a person who takes out a stethoscope and listens to your wallet.
Easter - a national celebration of chocolate.
Exercise - what you get when you walk from the front door to your car.
Experience - the name everyone gives to their mistakes.
Misfortune - The kind of fortune that never misses.