1. I am really an alien from the planet Phart.
2. I do not suffer fools.
3. I hate the smell of fish and do not eat seafood ( unless it is flake from the fish and chip shop ).The smell reminds me of "unclean" women.
4.I am a tight arse.This is a very common anomoly on Phart as things can easily crawl up your arse if it is not tight - lots of things tend to get up my arse on Earth. Unfortunate!
5. I wanted to study art at University but was "no allowed".
6. There is no area in my brain capable of understanding how to work a computer( this has to do with comming from another planet )
7. I hate broken egg shells - I have a fear of finding bits of shell in my sausage and egg McMuffins, cause the dumb idiots that make them always leave bits of shell in the eggs and it freaks me out.
8. I am 50 earth years old this year, but really I am over 1000 years old ( if I still lived on Phart ).