Sunday, March 01, 2009

At a low ebb...

My 50 year old brain has asked some questions to day for which there are no answers...

Niggly things that come up when I am feeling low...
Maybe my morning with mother sparked it....
Boy she must have screwed with my brain when I was little, cause it still has an impact on my life, my choices and how I view myself and the world in general.
I really do not think that it was a purposeful thing, just a survival thing.
The tactics used worked and manipulation and guilt were the way to go.
Phew..
About time I worked that stuff out of me, but sometimes it still sits there prodding me to make less than perfect decisions which then bear consequences.
Someone take the shovel from my hand and help me stop digging the hole I am finding myself in....

8 comments:

Jen said...

Oh you are not alone in wallowing a little this week. It seems to be somewhat widespread.

I will hand you the shovel to fill in that hole, but you probably, like me, would be better walking down a different street.

:)

Hugs,
xoxo

Michelle said...

Trouble is nothing changes if nothing changes.

Sometimes we just need to dare to be different....

xxxx

Lisa said...

you need to do that workshop- the goddess has made it so easy for you.......
sending lovexx

Anonymous said...

No workshop...no,no,no,,,you would have to break both my legs and tie me to a chair....I am sure that this is my shit anyway...the little old lady is just a convenient scapegoat...w.w

Melora said...

Yes a week of wallowing. Yes Renata it is your shit but in order to deal with it you need to face the root cause.....yes it is your mother. Stop punishing your self perhaps the workshop maybe what you need. Love Heidi
P.S if you need both of your legs broken and tied to a chair I think I may know someone........

Michelle said...

Listen to them you stubborn wench!

NOTHING CHANGES IF NOTHING CHANGES!!

This is something you really have to address so you can move forward.

Your choice my friend, stay in the fear or step into the unknown and trust that you are loved.

Michelle said...

AND I would have told you in the kitchen the other day but I didnt know you were there :0)

Lisa said...

poor baby- have you dug to china yet ?