From another planet

Went to a friend's birthday party tonight.
It was in the back yard, as they always have them, but as it is still August it was freezing cold the moment the sun said goodbye for the day.
Two drums were lit for a bon fire to keep us warm and we all huddled around pushing each other for warm space.
An elderly lady wearing a delightful tracksuit told me off for hogging the space in front of the fire and told me to move as she was getting cold, all this while lighting her 16th cigarette in the past hour.
I asked a friend of a friend who she was to be told that she lived next door with her daughter, her husband, who spent the night downing beer and burping as loudly as he possibly could and her daughter's son who lived in the caravan at the back of the house.
They all kept on looking at me as if I had dropped from another planet - especially the son from the caravan.
A hangi had been made and every half hour we were told that it would be another half hour before the food was ready.
We were cold and starving.
When the cue came that the food was ready, we made our way round the back of the house to see the hangi pit.The guys started to dig the dirt off the top, then remove the tin that had been insulating the food. Unfortunately whoever had prepared this feast decided in their wisdom to then put a piece of rubber backed carpet over the wire rack that held the food ( all securely covered in foil) as extra insulation to keep he heat in.
So therefore, all this food, which included beef, pork, chicken, potatoes, pumpkin etc had an amazing aroma of rubber and synthetic carpet impregnated through it.
It was enough to make you gag.
But we were all starving and frozen, so what the hell! The food was layed out, carved up in 5cm slices and everyone pretended not to notice the slight waft of rubber that was comming from the tables.
Pity I don't drink, cause at that point I needed one.
I had one small piece of beef and it felt like I was eating a piece of tyre, so I headed for the potato salad - it was cold, yet had garlic in it?? Not good at 10 pm at night.
I gave up.
I asked my husband if we could politely and quietly leave, which we did and I came home to have a hot cup of peppermint tea.
Heaven help my husband's bowels tomorrow!!!!
It was not a good night.