The pungent aroma of Chinese herbs!

Mmmmm! My house smells like the back of a Chinese restaurant on garbage night!!!And the man has to drink it, poor soul. I feel for him as I watch him pinch his nose and skull!
You know the intention of taking Chinese herbs is to frighten the body into recovery.

I have decided to put a sign up at my calendar kiosk that says, "BUY A CALENDAR - WE NEED THE MONEY!"
Somehow I do't think my boss will like that - but I do!

Talked to my "STAFF" members today - Lisa and Michelle ( aka Hairy Mary and Arty Farty Mary ) and boy..they ARE PUMPED!!!!!Can't wait to see how quickly the smile gets wiped off their faces, but I am deeply glad of their help and assistance.Thanks Mary and Mary! Shall I put that of your badges girls?
I am beginning to stress awfully - just had three wagon wheels without even blinking, but we seem to have most eveything under control for Monday.
Only two days left to sleep in...so don't ring me before 10am world! You hear?

Happy Birthday to me!

So,it was my birthday today and I managed to avoid most of the family...I really just felt like a quiet one this time around.
We had stuff to do and places to go - so we headed off to our Chinese herbalist and proceeded to pay out good money to be given a few bags of what looks like garden mulch (check picture!).The man has to make a nasty brew out of this suff and skull it twice a day. It stikes fear into the strongest of constitutions..but it works!
Then we had lunch at Jewels Tavern - highly recommended.
I had an enormous chicken schnitzel with an unfortunate looking mushroom sauce that looked like spew - but it tasted nice!
I went to Charlestown Square to introduce myself to the 'neighbours' namely Crazy John's and Terry White Chemist to be told by the guys at the chemist that they really don't like the fact that I will be blocking their stream of traffic with my kiosk for the next three months and that they will be takng it up with centre management.
Oh dear, here it goes!!!!
Hope I don't have to move - there is nowhere else for me to go.
Things went from mad to bad with a few more phone calls and problems to be sorted and by 4 oclock we still had not heard from the doctor. So the man made a call and was told that he would have to wait till Monday as his doctor had left for his holidays.
I am spending the evening drinking cock sucking cowboys which the man got me for my birthday...that should make me happy!

Making a meal from an apple pie!

Well, life goes on and as I am approaching Calendar Club time ( next week!!!)I took my mother out for the morning to hear her whine at me about how she will not be seeing me over the next few months and that I am not to forget that she is alive and how could I be deserting her etc,etc,etc.
So we go to McDonald's, which is her all time favorite food and I order her the obligatory McChicken, which I have to have three quarters of and she has a quarter, and an apple pie.
Now, we got through the burger ok, but then it was time for the apple pie.
My mother eats v e r y slowly. So slowly it is painful to watch.
But how can it take 15 minutes to eat half a McDonalds Apple Pie?
Yes..15 minutes.
I watched her twist and turn it, forget what she was doing half way through, remember again, suck out the apple, try to soften it with gulps of tea and twist and turn it over and over again.
I was patient..you would have been proud.
One of her main problems is the fact that her dentures, which were made for her when she was probably 40, no longer fit snugly and tend to move about a bit. The other problem is that half a piece of toast is now a "big meal".
I look forward to mushy food time - not!

A genuine thank you, again, to all of you that have sent their love and best wishes to us at this time. I cannot say enough just how much it has meant to us to just know that you care and are praying for the best outcome. It has meant the difference between curling up into a little ball in the darkest corner of my bedroom and being able to continue functioning.
We get back the results of the man's CT and Bone scans tomorrow and these are important ones as it will tell us how bad this beastie really is.

A Ton of Calendars!

Our stock arrived today!We now have a ton of calendars in our garage and strewn throughout the house. Yes - really. A ton of calendars arrived today and our fabulous delivery driver then proceeded to lift them off the truck and whilst almost breaking our letter box and scratching our driveway surface, he lost control of the pallet lifter and 480 kgs of calendars flew off and down our driveway in quite a ceremonious heap. Oh my God - now I had to take each box down by hand!
That took an hour.
Then my mother in law and I started the stock inventory. We have been at it for 10 hours between us and I have called it a day. There is probably about five hours to go before we get organised.
We have calendars about everything you can think about AND MORE!
Anyone want a calendar? Please?

Incontinence nurse?

My - how your world can change in just a few days!
I would have liked to have spent today going to lunch with the man and my daughter, maybe a movie or bowling ( haven't done that in ages ).Maybe a trip to Nelson Bay and a walk by the water. Maybe lunch with friends..
Instead, I was called by my increasingly dementia ridden mother at the crack of dawn with the question, "Is that you?".
Why did she call? Well, I really am still not sure - she just remembered something at 6 oclock in the morning and just had to share it with me. Not happy Jan!!!!!
Then I got on the phone to a specialist in Melborune who performs prostate surgery using state of the art machinery. They sent us info via email (how great is that!). We found out the price of this ( actually less than we were expecting ) even though it will be about $15,000, as we are not covered by private health insurance, if we want to go down that path.
Then, it was an appointment to our local GP and organising a possible "plan" for care for the next few months.
We were on the phone then to the 'incontinence nurse ' to talk about aspects of the post operation period if the cancer is found to be contained.
The man asked me, 'Where do we buy adult nappies from?' and I told him that we would cross that bridge when we came to it.
Then it was to Medicare to get some money back from some of the bills that we have already incurred.
Later I went to the Library and got about 8 books on prostate cancer to look through and also info about acid/alkaline balance in the body and its effects on our health.
And so the day was gone and I sat in the car telling the man what a fun day it had been!
I would have preferred to go to lunch with friends....

Is the world still turning?

I woke up this morning and for a split second, before full consciousness set in..everything felt normal.
Then I realised that it was just Sunday and I was suffering prostate cancer overload.
I now realise why people just get on with their daily lives, go to work, buy the groceries etc.. after such devestating news.There has to be some normality, some sort of routine kept up or the 'big c' takes over everything.
We are more upbeat today - Aleks is very positive and has made a rule that we must stay happy.
Between my husband and I, we have looked at so many web sites over the past 24 hours about prostate cancer that we have had enough.Its all just a jumble of information.
I have said that I will be giving the man reiki each day and we are going to look at changes in diet and exercise.
Tomorrow ,it's on the phone to make many calls and some enquiries.
I might be fooling myself into thinking that all of this is giving me some control back - but that is my opinion only.
The man is strong and he is willing to do what ever it takes and so am I.
I AM NOT prepared for any further bad news - so these tests on Wednesday are not something I am relishing. One more straw will break the camel's back.
The man has spent the day with some mates watching Bathurst and having a drink or two, or three or four..can't blame him.

Does anyone have a magic wand? Or know a good miracle worker?
My wand is up to shit..and I need help now!!!
So let me know, ok?

The Big 'C'.

Just when you thought that life might just slip one quietly past you....you were dreadfully wrong and the world came crashing down instead.
Well, I really was not expecting my darling to come home and tell me that he had cancer...but he did, and we now have to deal with it.
I have to thank all of you for your wishes and prayers. You have all been so kind and I have passed on all your messages to the man.
He is being very brave and sees it all in the logical way he sees everything. I am the one that falls apart, and that's what I did.
I was very angry yesterday and in shock.I just could not believe it - I was so sure that he would walk in and say that everything was fine.
I really believed that I had received an affirmation of a good outcome.
So, I felt cheated and very angry.
My faith has been tested and I am far from being accepting of this. I do not want to learn any lesson and I do not want to go through this particular trial.
My husband is a good man and does not deserve to have this in his life.
Unbelievably if he had not gone to his doctor he would have never known.
He had no pain, no symptoms..nothing.
It was just his hunch to go have a simple blood test just to make sure everything was ok.
People his age do not get this..he is too young.

Today I am slightly numb but at least not crying.
Where do we go from here?
The man needs more tests to see how this has spread or if it is contained - so that is the next hurdle.These tests will go ahead in a few days.
From there we will see what our options are.
Thats all I can say.

Waiting...waiting

I am sitting here in the loungeroom waiting for my husband to return from the specialist with his results from the biopsy he had two weeks ago on his prostate.
This is agony....the specialist is running late and my husband should have been home by now.
I have eaten everything that isn't bolted down just so I am doing something and feel rather ill, so I thought that I would blog instead.
How do you wait for information like this?
Even the mere possibility of cancer is too much to consider - how do people do this?
Anyway....
Yesterday our fixtures arrived for our calendar kiosk. Now I know it's "FOR REAL" and we are truely committed.
My daughter asked me yesterday, " Mum, how many days does Calendar Club go for?".
All I could say is, "Too many" and left it at that.
For anyone who doesn't know, Calendar Club is a seasonal business that I commit to every October to January where I sell calendars at a local shopping complex from a kiosk.
It's where I make my "real" money.
I work on commission and my whole family is involved. My husband builds the kiosk and helps organise me and pulls me into line when I become the "drama queen from hell". He does maintanence and all the physical hard work.
My older daughter helps sell calendars on her days off and my younger daughter whinges and says that I am continully telling her to "hurry up" and that I am constantly in a bad mood.
My mother in law helps at the kiosk and does all the book work - which is HOURS of work.Each item has to be checked in and out otherwise we get charged for it at full price at the end of the season and have to wear the cost if it is stolen or a mistake on the part of the company having charged us incorrectly.
My mother's house is used as a storage facility for boxes and excess and our house becomes a shed with calendars in every available orifice, garage, bedrooms, hallways etc...It's so much fun just before Christmas.
We have a crazy Christmas with only two days off ( maybe it will only be one day this year if trading happens on boxing day ) and I work about 90 hours per week during the season - each day selling at the kiosk and then the bits and pieces when I get home, like banking, stock selection, bookwork etc.
By the end of the season I am 'cactus' and counting the days to the end.
Of course my psychic stuff gets put on hold and I wind down readings and my contribution to Rose Cottage which makes me feel totally guilty - as I wish I was there but can't be.
By the way....I am still waiting for my man to walk through the door....

So, come and see me and buy a Calendar. I am at Chalestown Square, lower level near the Chemist - plus I will probably be needing a coffee and to go the the toilet!
I can't write any more..I think I will go eat something...it's been at least 10 minutes since the last time I put food in my mouth..

Where were you in 1975?

I am sitting here watching a program on what was hot in 1975 - Remember Sherbet?
Didn't they turn evil when they started wearning make up! My best friend ran their Newcastle based fan club and that is all I heard about. Boy, the stories she made up about what when on between the boys and her on a weekend at a gig! I knew it was all lies, but I let her go anyway cause she used to give me free Sherbert albums.Apparently the guys were'nt keen on the make up either, but that was the craze - especially with the likes of Kiss and the american bands with so much long permed hair and tight, tight pants...and the glossy silver eye shadow.
You could still get a decent cream bun and cream horn at the shop. (Yum)
What about flaired pants.....I remember having a pink pair - oh so stylish!
1975 was over 30 years ago - oh my God!!!!I was in high school and hated it. I would go to my friend's place before school every day and we would walk to school together and always be late.
That seems such a long time ago - yes...I AM old.

Psychic Weekend

The last two days have been spent at Salamander Bay ( about an hour's drive from Newcastle) at a Psychic Fair where I was doing readings.
I have come to accept that these events will never make me 'oodles' of money, but I enjoy the company of other psychics and its great for networking.
So with that intent I enjoyed the weekend and the few readings that I did do were very rewarding. I got a lot of valuable feedback that made me very happy with where I am currently at capability wise and the advice and discussion amongst the other psychics is always a learning opportunity.
I returned this afternoon feeling very ordinary indeed and was happy to be back with my family who I am missing very much at the moment.
I hate spending too much time away from them and now with the added worry of the health of my hubby it makes each moment together even more important.
I got some special crystals from Monika, the crystal lady, to give my husband to wear for a while while all this crap gets sorted..Thanks Monika.
Anniversary of Bali bombing at Jimbaran Bay today. The Balinese are doing badly.Tourism has not recovered..always the same...a small number of arse holes spoil it for everyone else.
Long weekend - tomorrow is a holiday for most.What are you doing?

Important Scientific Research!

A South American scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain and sexual activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

Local Man "violated" by alien implement!

News to hand!
Local man reports being abducted by an alien being posing as a doctor and is then violated by an instrument he calls "an anal probe" before being released many miles from home.
Mr X ( name witheld to protect identity ) says that he will never be the same after his encounter with an indescribable alien species.
Mr X says that he was firstly transported to another dimension where he found himself in "some sort of sterile environment where I was approached from behind by this crazed animal with what looked liked an oversized dildo which was then placed in a very sensitive area of my body, which I cannot mention as it is still too raw a memory for me".
Mr.X continued his extraordinary tale by stating that the alien then proceeded to extract pieces of flesh from him to use in experimentations on board the mother ship.
"I cannot believe that I have lived through this ordeal.
This experience has burnt an indellible memory into my brain."
Mr.X is currently recovering at home receiving loving care from his wife and will not be giving any further interviews at this point.
We are lucky to have received a photo of the "instrument" used in the violation process that Mr.X captured with a digital camera that he just happened to have with him at the time.

Biopsy Day

My darling husband is having a biopsy done today - part of ongoing testing to check a prostate irregularity.
Now, I know it could all be very uncomplicated and simple, but I am also fearful of what we don't know and every time a test is done it seems that we have to wait an enormously painful length of time to find out a result.
I am stressed and jumpy and it's not even happening to me!
The test is a horribly invasive proceedure for a man (us women are used to being poked, scraped, stretched and viewed from totally perverse angles) and I wish he did not have to go through it - but better that he does.
The prostate is one of those ridiculous parts of the body that has such a great significance to a man's health yet they often refuse to address the importance of it until it is too late.
If you have a man you care about and he is over 40, get him to do a simple blood test next time he is having a medical check up and maybe even the "dreaded gloved finger up the sphinxter" just to be sure nothing sinister is not developing.
Sometimes there are sympotms, but sometimes, such as in my husband's case, there aren't and if he had not gone to his local JP and if she had not ordered a simple blood test for him, we would have never known anything was wrong.
I need my darling around for a long time to come - he is my life.....so I know all will be well. I just wish that this all passes quickly.

The Cynic's Dictionary

Got a new book today called "The Cynic's Dictionary" - let me share a few gems!

Clairvoyant - a person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely that he is a blockhead.
Ambrose Bierce.

Children - items that have become so expensive, only the poor can afford them.
Hal Roach.

Doctor - a person who takes out a stethoscope and listens to your wallet.
Anon.

Easter - a national celebration of chocolate.
Mike Barfield

Exercise - what you get when you walk from the front door to your car.
Anon.

Experience - the name everyone gives to their mistakes.
Oscar Wilde.

Misfortune - The kind of fortune that never misses.
Ambrose Pierce.

School fair at Bero!

Went to a school fair today - was supposed to do some readings, but somehow it did not work out that way.
We were almost totally ignored! I could actually hear people saying "Don't go over there..don't go over there!"
I thought that I had sufficiently trimmed my horns back enough to be totally unnoticable, but obviously not.
I was waiting for a mini school play of "the Wickerman" to be reproduced around the side of the school hall with us as the main stars!
To say that we felt a bit alienated is to put it mildly..but what can you do.
Never mind....maybe we did charge too much for our readings? I just think no one was willing to get close enough to even see the sign without a wreath of garlic and a wooden stake in their hands.
Another psychic fair next weekend.....we will try again.
I could just see Lisa's face with that "I'm so over it" expression on her face, so when we said, at 12 noon, that we'd had enough - let's go to McDonalds - it was a blessed relief.
It was all good - had a nice morning out.
Thanks Leanne and Deb for comming along too!You are both crack ups!

Sir Richard....we love you!!!

Sir Richard Branson committed about $4 billion ( yes BILLION )to help develop alternatives to fossil fuels and cut green house gas levels around the world.
He also told Australia to "stop dragging the chain" and sign the Kyoto aggreement.
It is only Australia and America that remain world wide wankers in this regard....Can it really be true? Are we finally getting it?
Sir Richard, we love you!!!
Go Virgin! Go Virgin! Go Virgin!

Life is one big, fat guilt trip!

“Guilt is regret for what we’ve done.
Regret is guilt for what we didn’t do.”
Why is guilt such a powerful emotion?
I sometimes feel that everything that I have done in my life has been motivated by feelings of guilt.
And, being the good Libran that I am, I balance that out by feeling guilty whether I DO and also feeling guilty whether I DONT.
When did all this start?
I think I first felt guilty in my mother's womb - that I was unexpected is an understatment!
Then as I was dragged around her life, I just learned to feel guilty about just being alive.So sad eh...well I am guilty here of allowing it to continue - SEE!!!!
And so it progresses..... I still make myself feel terribly guilty about many things that I choose to do and you can reason with yourself that you cannot please everybody blah, blah..but even the fact that you spend time feeling guilty makes you feel guilty cause you could be doing something better with your time.
“Guilt is the source of sorrow, 'tis the fiend, Th' avenging fiend, that follows us behind, With whips and stings" Nicholas Rowe.
Guilt needs the BIG FLICK!

ABUNDANCE AT SPRINGTIME

I am very much focusing on bringing abundance to myself and my family this springtime and am hoping for a chance at renewing my thoughts and wishes at our Ostara ritual this Wednesday night.
It is a time of abundance and good cheer yet there have been many deaths lately that I have heard of - even today a lady who had booked in a reading with me this week had to cancel because of a death within the family.
I remember the passing of my own father at around this time last year and one of my friend's calling me last week to tell me that her husband's dad has also passed that day.This brings me to say that we often want new things to come into our lives but we forget that some of the old has to make way for the new stuff to happen.
It is a time to be SO thankful for every day that we have that is without ill health. All else can be sorted out eventually.
We also need to remember our mother earth and that she supplies us with everything that we have - from the water that we drink and the food that we eat to the shelter that houses us and the air that we breathe.
We have grown used to her just being there - forever giving, forever providing.
Thought I would jog your memory as to how beautiful she is with this pic..

Thought for the night

"I don't want to go among mad people" Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat.
"We're all mad here."
Lewis Carroll from
"Alice in Wonderland"

School Disco

My daughter had a school disco to go to a few night's ago.It was a dress up one - "spooks".
She chose to go as .....wait for it......a witch!
How original.
She told me that she wouldn't have to go and buy an outfit as everything she needs is already at home.
One thing she asked me was whether she could wear her pentagram and take her handbag which also has a pentagram on it.
I thought about it for about half a second and said no.
She goes to a catholic school and I told her that I did not want her to have any trouble that night by showing up with "heathen" symbols around her neck.
She understood that "we don't need to be asked any more questions, considering that you have only a few months left at this school, my darling".
I think that they all know anyway, as I turn up everyday to pick up my girl from school in my car which has a pentagram and a sticker saying "witchybitz" on it.
P.S. Those socks she is wearing are mine. Or at least they were. She has now claimed them as her own. They are my most favourite witchy socks.
Must go look for another pair now..